Funeral Planning Checklist: Everything You Need to Prepare

Why Does Funeral Planning Matter Before It Becomes Urgent?

Funeral planning removes the burden of guesswork from grieving families and ensures your wishes are honored. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), 62.5% of Americans say it is very important to communicate funeral plans to family members before death — yet only 21.4% have actually done so (NFDA Consumer Awareness and Preferences Study, 2017). That gap between intention and action means most families face hundreds of decisions, under emotional distress, within days of a loss.

The financial stakes are significant. The NFDA reports that the median cost of a funeral with burial is $9,995 when a vault is included, while a funeral with cremation averages $6,280 (NFDA General Price List Study, 2023). These costs do not include cemetery plots, grave markers, flowers, or obituary notices — extras that can push the total well past $12,000. Families making these decisions in grief, without guidance, often overspend or choose arrangements that do not reflect the deceased's preferences.

Meanwhile, estate preparedness in the United States is alarmingly low. Caring.com's 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study found that only 24% of respondents have a will — down from 33% in 2022. More than 55% of Americans die without any estate plan, and 71.6% do not have an up-to-date will (Advance Capital Management, 2025). The combination of no will, no funeral plan, and no communicated wishes creates a cascade of stress, conflict, and expense for surviving family members.

This checklist is designed to change that. Whether you are planning ahead for yourself or helping a loved one prepare, these steps cover every essential category — legal, financial, ceremonial, digital, and personal.

What Legal Documents Should You Prepare First?

Start with the four foundational legal documents that protect your wishes and your family: a will, an advance healthcare directive, a durable power of attorney, and a healthcare power of attorney. Only 40% of older Americans have all four of these documents in place, and 33% have not discussed any end-of-life plans with their family (Advance Capital Management, 2025).

What Is the Difference Between a Will and an Advance Directive?

A will dictates the distribution of your assets after death, while an advance directive governs your medical care while you are still alive but unable to communicate. Both are essential, but they serve different purposes at different stages. A will names beneficiaries, designates a guardian for minor children, and appoints an executor to carry out your instructions. An advance directive — also called a living will — specifies which medical treatments you want or do not want if you become incapacitated, including decisions about life support, resuscitation, and organ donation.

A healthcare power of attorney (sometimes called a healthcare proxy) names a specific person to make medical decisions on your behalf. A durable power of attorney does the same for financial matters. Without these documents, courts will decide who makes decisions for you — a process that is expensive, slow, and often does not reflect what you would have wanted.

How Should You Plan the Financial Side of a Funeral?

Set a budget, understand your consumer rights, and explore payment options before they are needed. Funeral costs have been rising at approximately 6% per year for traditional burials and 8% per year for cremation services (NFDA, 2025). Planning ahead locks in current prices and prevents families from making emotional financial decisions under pressure.

How Much Does a Funeral Actually Cost in 2025?

The total cost depends heavily on the type of service and your geographic location. Here is a breakdown of median costs based on NFDA data:

Regional variation is substantial. Hawaii has the highest average funeral cost at approximately $14,975, while Mississippi has the lowest at around $6,684 (World Population Review). Urban areas typically cost more due to higher real estate prices for cemetery plots — some urban plots exceed $10,000.

What Consumer Rights Protect You When Buying Funeral Services?

The Federal Trade Commission's Funeral Rule is your most important legal protection. Enacted in 1984 and still actively enforced, the Funeral Rule gives you the right to receive an itemized General Price List (GPL) from any funeral home, choose only the goods and services you want, and purchase caskets from outside vendors without penalty (FTC, 2024). Violations can result in penalties of up to $53,088 per occurrence.

Key rights under the Funeral Rule:

• Itemized pricing: Funeral homes must provide written prices for every individual service and product — no bundled packages required.
• Phone price disclosure: You can get accurate pricing information by phone without visiting in person. However, FTC undercover investigations in 2023 found that 39 out of 250+ funeral homes still violated this requirement (FTC, 2024).
• No required embalming: Embalming is not legally required in most situations. Funeral homes cannot charge for unauthorized embalming and must disclose in writing that it is generally not mandatory.
• Third-party caskets: You can legally buy a casket anywhere — online retailers, warehouse stores, specialty vendors — and the funeral home cannot charge a handling fee for using it.
• No required casket for cremation: No state law mandates a casket for cremation. An alternative container must be offered.

For more on understanding your financial options, see our complete digital legacy planning guide, which covers financial accounts, digital assets, and long-term preservation strategies.

What Are the Best Ways to Fund a Funeral in Advance?

There are several funding mechanisms, each with advantages and limitations:

What Type of Funeral Service Should You Choose?

The choice between burial, cremation, and alternative options depends on your personal beliefs, budget, and environmental values. According to NFDA's 2025 Cremation & Burial Report, the projected U.S. cremation rate for 2025 is 63.4%, with the burial rate at 31.6%. By 2045, cremation is expected to reach 82.3%. This shift is driven by lower costs, greater flexibility, and growing environmental awareness.

What Are the Main Service Options Available?

Funeral services generally fall into several categories, each allowing different levels of customization:

• Traditional funeral with burial: Visitation/viewing, formal ceremony (religious or secular), graveside service, and burial. Most expensive but familiar to many families.
• Funeral with cremation: Ceremony with the body present, followed by cremation. Combines the ritual of a traditional funeral with the flexibility of cremation.
• Memorial service: Ceremony without the body present. Can be held days, weeks, or even months after death, providing flexibility for far-flung family.
• Celebration of life: Less formal, often upbeat gathering focused on the person's life rather than their death. A growing trend in American funeral culture.
• Direct burial or direct cremation: No ceremony, viewing, or visitation. The most affordable options, chosen by families who prefer private mourning or plan a separate memorial later.
• Green/natural burial: No embalming, biodegradable casket or shroud, no vault. Interest has increased significantly — NFDA data shows 53.8% of consumers are interested in exploring green options.
• Body donation to science: Donating remains for medical research. Typically free, though transportation costs may apply.

Interestingly, the role of religion in funeral services is declining. The percentage of Americans who feel it is very important to have religion incorporated into a funeral dropped from 49.5% in 2012 to 39.5% in 2017 (NFDA), with the trend continuing downward. This mirrors broader shifts in American religious identity and has led to rising demand for secular celebrants and personalized, non-traditional ceremonies.

What Should Your Complete Funeral Planning Checklist Include?

A thorough funeral plan covers seven categories: legal documents, financial arrangements, service preferences, body disposition, personal touches, digital assets, and personal messages. Use this comprehensive checklist to ensure nothing is missed.

What Goes Into the Legal and Financial Section?

This section ensures your legal and financial house is in order. Review and complete each item:

• Will or trust created and stored securely (only 24% of Americans have one)
• Advance healthcare directive signed and shared with healthcare proxy
• Healthcare and financial powers of attorney designated
• Life insurance policies reviewed; beneficiaries confirmed
• Funeral funding method chosen (prepaid, insurance, POD account)
• Executor or personal representative named and informed
• Safe deposit box or secure storage location shared with a trusted person
• Copy of Social Security card, birth certificate, marriage certificate, military discharge papers (DD-214) accessible
• List of all financial accounts, including banks, investments, and debts

What Details Should You Specify for the Ceremony?

The more detail you provide, the less your family must decide under pressure. Consider documenting:

• Preferred funeral home or cremation provider (compare at least 3 — only 18.9% of Americans do, per NFDA)
• Type of service: traditional, memorial, celebration of life, or private
• Religious or secular ceremony; specific officiant, celebrant, or clergy
• Location preference: funeral home, place of worship, outdoor venue, or family home
• Body disposition: burial, cremation, natural burial, or body donation
• If burial: preferred cemetery, casket type, vault preference, headstone or marker
• If cremation: urn selection, final placement (cemetery niche, scattering, kept at home)
• Music selections (14% of Americans have already chosen their funeral playlist, per Trust & Will/Talker Research, 2025)
• Readings, poems, or scripture passages
• Pallbearers and honorary pallbearers
• Floral preferences or donations in lieu of flowers
• Dress code or attire preference for the service
• Specific charities for memorial donations
• Obituary outline: key life facts, achievements, survivors, predeceased

How Should You Handle Digital Assets and Online Accounts?

Your digital footprint is now as significant as your physical estate. From social media profiles and email accounts to cryptocurrency wallets and cloud storage, digital assets require deliberate planning. Yet 32% of older Americans have not informed their family where to find legal, medical, and financial documents — let alone digital credentials (Advance Capital Management, 2025).

What Digital Assets Need to Be Included in Your Plan?

A complete digital asset inventory should cover every online account and digital property you own:

• Email accounts — Gmail, Outlook, Yahoo, etc. Set up Google's Inactive Account Manager to designate who receives your data.
• Social media — Facebook (legacy contact), Instagram, X/Twitter, LinkedIn, TikTok. Each platform has different memorialization or deletion policies.
• Financial accounts — Banking, investment, and payment platforms (PayPal, Venmo). Ensure beneficiaries are named.
• Cryptocurrency — Private keys and wallet recovery phrases must be securely shared; assets are unrecoverable without them.
• Cloud storage — Google Drive, iCloud, Dropbox. These may contain irreplaceable photos, documents, and personal files.
• Subscriptions — Streaming services, SaaS tools, recurring memberships. Document these so they can be cancelled.
• Domains and websites — If you own a website or blog, designate someone to manage or close it.
• Password manager — Use one with an emergency access feature and document the master password securely.

For a detailed walkthrough of digital asset management, see our digital legacy planning complete guide. Apple users should also set up a Legacy Contact in their iPhone or Mac settings.

Why Should Personal Messages Be Part of Your Funeral Plan?

Legal documents and financial plans protect your estate — but personal messages protect your relationships. A 2017 survey by the New York Life Foundation found that 57% of those who lost a parent during childhood said support from family and friends faded within three months, even though it took an average of six years to move forward (Experience Camps, 2024). A pre-recorded message or letter ensures your voice persists long after the funeral is over.

What Types of Personal Messages Can You Prepare?

Personal messages come in many forms, each serving a different purpose:

Research consistently shows that meaningful communication before death — not just physical presence — is what reduces complicated grief and depression in bereaved families. Among parents who discussed death openly with their terminally ill child, none regretted doing so (Kreicbergs et al., 2004, New England Journal of Medicine). The same principle applies to all relationships: saying what matters while you can is one of the most protective acts against future regret.

How Do You Share Your Plan With Your Family?

A plan that no one knows about is not a plan at all. An estimated 46% of will executors were not even aware a will existed (Advance Capital Management, 2025). Sharing your funeral plan requires deliberate communication.

What Is the Best Way to Start the Conversation?

Choose a calm, private moment — not a holiday dinner or a health crisis. Frame the conversation around love and relief, not morbidity. You might say: "I've put together my wishes so you will never have to guess. I want to walk you through them so you feel prepared, not burdened." Research shows that 87% of Americans age 55 and over believe it is the parent's responsibility to initiate this conversation (Advance Capital Management, 2025).

Practical steps for sharing your plan:

• Create a master document that lists where all important documents are stored — physical and digital.
• Designate a "point person" — your executor, a trusted family member, or a close friend — who knows the full plan.
• Share copies of your will, advance directive, and powers of attorney with your attorney, executor, and healthcare proxy.
• Use a secure digital platform to store and deliver personal messages. Services like LastWithYou allow you to record messages that are automatically delivered to designated recipients after your death.
• Review annually — Life changes (marriage, divorce, birth, death, moves) require plan updates. Yet fewer than half of Americans with wills have updated them recently (Caring.com, 2025).

What Commonly Gets Forgotten in Funeral Planning?

Even thorough planners frequently overlook several important details that can cause significant stress for survivors.

What Are the Most Overlooked Items?

These items are consistently missed in end-of-life planning:

• Pet care arrangements: Who will care for your pets? Document feeding routines, veterinary info, and a designated caretaker.
• Organ and tissue donation: Register your decision and inform your healthcare proxy. A simple "yes" on your driver's license is not always sufficient.
• Employer notifications: Your family may need to contact your employer for final paychecks, benefits, retirement accounts, and life insurance through work.
• Recurring bills and subscriptions: Mortgage, rent, utilities, insurance premiums, streaming services — these do not stop when you die.
• Social media wishes: Do you want accounts memorialized, deleted, or managed by someone specific?
• Vehicle titles: If vehicles are in your name only, transferring ownership requires paperwork.
• Storage units: If you rent storage, ensure someone knows and has access.
• Personal messages to loved ones: 65% of Americans have thought about their funeral arrangements, but only 17% have considered who receives their possessions — and even fewer have written personal messages (Trust & Will/Talker Research, 2025).

What Does a Printable Funeral Planning Checklist Look Like?

Here is a consolidated checklist you can use as a starting point. Customize it based on your personal circumstances, family situation, and preferences.

Conclusion

Funeral planning is not about dwelling on death — it is about protecting the people you love from unnecessary stress, expense, and regret. Every item on this checklist represents one fewer decision your family will have to make while grieving. The legal documents protect your wishes. The financial plan prevents overspending. The ceremony details honor your life. And the personal messages — a farewell video, a legacy letter, a recording of your voice — become the most treasured part of everything you leave behind.

You do not need to complete everything in a single day. Start with the most urgent items — your will, your advance directive, and a conversation with your point person. Then work through the rest at your own pace. The best time to plan was years ago. The second best time is right now.

If you are thinking about what to say in a personal message, our guides on writing a letter to your children and why leaving a message matters can help you get started.